Low Budget Tron

They made this:

So I made this.

Thanks to Steve Spicer for the original link.

Sainsbury's idea declined

Dear Mr Edward

Thanks for your email.  I can appreciate that having a store layout plan would be really helpful when shopping for groceries.

It’s a great idea, although unfortunately we currently don’t offer this service.

There are a few reasons why we don’t, one being the frequency in which items change position or have stock issues.

Stores will also move the layout in accordance with the most current promotions too, so may cause confusion on set plans.

This is not to say we won’t take this on board as we’re always looking for new ways to make you store visits as enjoyable as possible.

With that in mind, I’ve passed your feedback on to the store planning team for future review.

I appreciate you taking the time to get in touch and we look forward to seeing you in store again soon.

Kind regards

Mark Donaldson
Customer Manager

I doubt this is true, but you never know

My colleague sent me this email. It did make me chuckle. I doubt it's real, but it hardly matters

"This letter was sent to the Kirkcaldy High School Principals office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for seniors. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door raffle prize and was writing to say thank you.

This story is a credit to all humankind. Forward this to anyone you know who might need a lift today.

Dear Kirkcaldy High School ,

God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent Senior Citizens luncheon. I am 87 years old and live at the Raith home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away so I am all alone. I want to thank you for the kindness you have shown to a forgotten old lady.

My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio; but, she would never let me listen to it. She said it belonged to her long dead husband, and understandably, wanted to keep it safe.

The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a dozen pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I was overjoyed that I could tell her to fuck off.

Thank you for that wonderful opportunity.

God bless you all.

Sincerely,

Isa."

Great shopping list idea

Dear Sainsbury's

I had a great idea last night as I wondered around the Luton, Bramingham store. My wife gave me a shopping list, with £120 worth of shopping on it. Although the list was comprehensive, she had just made the list throughout the week, so when I got to the store, the articles were in a random order. This meant that as I did my shopping, I was continuously having to track back and find articles on the list that I had inadvertently walked past.

So I had an idea.

It would be very useful if for all of your stores, you had a printed or downloadable plan of the store, broken into sections, ie:

Fresh Veg / Fresh Meat / Butchers / Deli / Tins / Alcohol / etc. You could even do this as a plan of the store. THis plan could then have space along side the sections (shelves) where people, like my wife, could write the list. Then, when people like me go to do the shopping, it's all in the correct order.

I'm sure you'd agree this would be a very useful thing for your customers, and a great value add.

I'd be happy to help you develop this idea further. I am a graphic designer by trade and would be happy to work with your team to draft something up for trial if you thought it a worthy idea.

I hope yo hear from you soon.

Sincerely

How much is enough?

It's another big rollover in the Euromillions lottery. An estimated £126 million. That's enough to make anyone sit up and listen, and want to buy a ticket. I play the lottery once in a while, and Euromillions even less frequently. I put my hands up to being sucked in to having a go when the big money rollovers come up, and why wouldn't I, the money would come in handy.

But I started thinking on the way to work this morning. £126m is a lot of money. An awful lot of money. Does anyone really need to win that much?

I remember when the National Lottery launched, and the jackpot was about £6 or £7 million. That seemed like a lot of money back then. It was, and it still is. But next to £126m it sounds like small change. I have been involved in conversations to that effect, where it's hard to imagine anything other than disappointment at winning the Saturday draw, and missing out on the big one.

But how would be enough? I started to think, what if we capped the possible jackpot winnings to, say £30m, but continued to allow the winnings to roll-over. Then, what if, we gave the rest of the winnings to a charity. That money could do a lot of good. Imagine, in East Africa, where millions are starving and losing their lives. That money could go so far to help.

Red Nose Day 2011 has raised £102m to date. An incredible sum, but Euromillions manages to raise that in a few short weeks in jackpot payments.

It actually made me feel a bit sick when I thought of it like that.

So how about it. Let's be a bit greedy, and indulge ourselves in our dreams. But £30m is more than enough. Why not let someone less fortunate win.

Dyson

I liked this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WNcjkZ6d0w

So I made this:

The best 5 pounds I ever spent

Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you... the best 5 pounds I have ever spent. Some years ago, at Christmas, I was involved in a secret Santa debacle. The recipient was to be my friend Mike, a media studies teacher at the college I worked at. 5 quid is not a lot of dosh as we know, but I was determined not to take the easy route and purchase him two copies of a used, 1988 back issue of razzle.

Which, incidentally, he would have loved.

And so, while perusing the mall arndale in luton, I came across the little Orange analogue radio, photographed below. I was instantly taken with the kitsch retro design, and hardy Orange casing. Never one to miss a bargain, I bought 3 of the little beauties. One for me, one for Mike and one for my brother.

Job done.

I reckon that must have been 7 years ago. The aerial broke off about 6 years ago, but it hardly seems to have made a difference to the reception. And so the little orange radio sits on the windowsill in my bathroom most of the time.

I love the radio I do. I love listening to it in the shower, in the bath, on the loo. I rarely go in there without turning the little radio on. You'll often hear me screaming with rage at a devils advocate presenter on talk sport or 5 live. If you live in my bathroom that is.

But since my baby was born, the little radio has really come into its own. When he was a tiny baby, he'd really fight against going to sleep. Then, one day, I read an article about babies finding white noise to be soothing. It's a womb thing apparently. That evening as we were putting him to bed, I remembered the article and decided to give the little Orange radio a try.

On tuning it to 108 fm (no aerial, remember) it let out a constant hissy hiss. I placed the radio in the cot, and lo-and-behold, the d-rod miraculously stopped crying, stared at the wall, and fell asleep.

And so he continues to do now.

What a wonderful little radio. I salute you.

No, it won't go any bigger

The Emergency Services

Something I've noticed about the emergency services, is that they are always in a hurry. Beeping their horns...harrassing people...

In other news, I saw an excellent mentalist in the road just now, right outside Guy Richie's place that was taken over by a free school in Rathbone Place. He was screaming at the top of his lungs, then kept stopping to pick up what looked like little pieces of paper. He also kicked a wall.

I sometimes feel like doing that. No-one seemed to pay any notice to him. Maybe I'll give it a go one day.

Doing what I do best

... in the pub on my own, listening to tunes.

Monday shmunday

They don't get any easier do they, mondays. Thank god then for the Sunday service with jarvis cocker, and the finest hour with guy garvey. Two radio programmes on bbc 6 music, without which I doubt I'd make it through through day.

It'd be interesting to meet the director of programming at 6 music. They just got it so so right in getting those two making radio programmes. It's a bit like when Bob Dylan did his theme time radio hour. There really is something so heart warming about non-radio people doing radio. They screw up all the time, scythe wrong things, occasionally let a little swear through the net. It just seems a bit more human.

I could quite happily listen to that kind of show all day. Diverse, interesting, informed, funny, intelligent, heart felt... more of the same please BBC, and I will happily keep paying my license fee.

New day, new milk

Day 4 after Dylan's trip to the hospital, and it looks like the medication isn't doing much really, which points towards a lactose intolerance. So, the doctor has prescribed some super special AA grade lactose free milk. Which surely means it's not milk non? Anyway, so far the d-rod is taking it nicely, which is a total result because apparently it tastes like shit.

Needless to say, I  won't be testing whether it does or not.

It never ceases to amaze me quite how much paraphernalia there is with babies, and the feeding of them. We're currently onto our third type of bottle. Then there's the bag full of nappies, wipes, creams, powder milk containers, bottle warmers, bibs, muslin cloths, hip flasks and cigarettes. I could go on.

There's nearly as much shit to carry round as there is with golf, and that's saying something.

Pickchers

As you may or may not already know I occasionally take myself out onto the mean streets of London, and wander around taking random photos. I've been doing this for a long time, with various different cameras, but I'm currently using my HTC handset with various different Retro effects. I know they're a bit overused. It's easy these days, just download an app and away you go, but there's something lush about the retro quality of these pics which was somehow lost wit the ultra vivid clarity of modern digital photography.

But, like most people, I can't really be bothered to send roles of film to the chemists anymore. Or sit there scanning my polaroids prints. Or pay £20 a pack for Polaroid film for that matter. As much as I like the idea. So, I'm just going to go with it.

Here's a couple of shots from today. Maybe one day I'll write a story to tie them all together or something.

Acid reflux

A couple of days ago, Dylan was diagnosed with GERD disease by the pediatrician at the hospital. This is a severe form of acid reflux, which is caused by a variety of factors, from an immature digestive tract, to an intolerance to milk. It's reasonably common apparently. And with any luck, the medication we now have will help sort the problem out. But, it goes a long way to explain the fits of painful screaming he's been having. It's heartbreaking to see him like that, and its very trying for my wife who's with him all day.

Despite all this, we're still the lucky ones. Some babies have far more serious problems that they carry with them into the world. But I guess we all just play the team we're put up against, and it's been a challenge.

On the funny side, we rushed him to the doctors this evening after a 4 hour screaming rant. We were very worried, and I rushed home early from work. Arriving at the docs, my wife explained his symptoms, while Dylan laughed and smiled at the doctor. Classic.

Sinister table

Doodle of the day

Thought I might rekindle poodle of the day.

Misery bear

Whoever made this little video on the BBC website has obviously been following me around for the last few years. This is BRILLIANT: http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/clips/p00dxtxf/misery_bear_misery_bear_goes_to_work/

Contentious Musical Post

I'm going to lay it on the line. I'm getting really into The Streets. Typically, this is happen just as Mike Skinner has called time on it. Especially the first two albums and the last one.

Theory about the universe

Ok, so I was feeding my little boy last night, pondering the universe, as you do. I've been getting well into physics and quantum theory and stuff lately. I don't really get it much, but I think that's why I've been getting into it. It's hard. It's challenging. No-one really knows what the answer is. I like that.

So, I was watching a programme about quantum physics and the double slit paradox (which is explained here: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4237751840526284618#)

Apparently we can change the way particles of light behave just by looking at them. Interesting, and yes, mysterious.

I then thought, what a waste it would be if there was no life in the universe. Imagine having a universe, all that beauty and splendour, stars, galaxies, nebulae, etc, but noone there to actully see and appreciate it. What a waste! It reminded me of the question about whether a tree falling down in a forest with nobody there to witness it, makes any noise. Perhaps we are all here by way of a validation. Just by being here, and being able to witness the universe, and all the things around us, we are in some way validating its existence.

Perhaps we are here on Earth to validate the sections of the universe that we can see. In which case, who is validating the sections of the universe we can't see?

Then my little boy threw up over my shoulder and went to sleep.